He is such a slut. More and more my type.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
