What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
