that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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