Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
