question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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