At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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