I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize