Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
