Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize