just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Randomize
