Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize
