i always forget guys have bellybuttons
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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