I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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