First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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