i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Randomize
