Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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