Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
