I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
