Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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