just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
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