I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
