I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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