these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
