using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
