She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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