Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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