Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
