Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
sarcasm needs its own font
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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