I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
