Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
