he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
