I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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