Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Randomize
