Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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