Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
