I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
