Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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