if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
