A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I feel like abortions should bother me more
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
