I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
It's never too late to be topless.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
