i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
