none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
