the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
We talked him into tasing himself.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
