Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
