It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
