You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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