So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
