I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
