Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize