My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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