There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Your cock deserves a montage
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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